Working with Friends Can End in Divorce
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Working with Friends Can End in Divorce

friends, marriage, divorce, working with friends, friendships like marriages

For many people, friendships are a lot like marriages. We may fight and have arguments; we might even say words we wish we hadn’t said, but in the end we are still friends because we have a committed friendship relationship with each other. When a friendship breaks up, it feels much like divorcing a spouse. Even if your former friend, didn’t have a romantic relationship, when you part, it feels like a terrible divorce.

I’ve lost a friend or two in the last couple of years. I loved each person for who they were. I didn’t always like their actions to other people, but I as long as their actions never affected me, I felt it wasn’t my business. I just let them work things out or not work them out. However, recently I had a friend who was very abusive to a friend of mine. I should have taken a stand and told him his behavior was wrong, but I didn’t, because it wasn’t any of my business.

I have lost a friend for having my own mind. Essentially because I was able to stand up to him, he turned on me. We had a working relationship, and I earned every penny of it as an independent contractor. Now that there was no more contract work, there was just this plan to rewrite or spin content that’s already published and put the new articles on his site. A great plan, in theory, that would allow for articles to be bought by prospective buyers. I was really buying into his idea, until reality set in, that my articles could sit for years and not sell. I needed to make money on my own, and I did just that.

This person was a very dear friend. He was the only person of the “male persuasion” that I let close to my heart. I was like his big sister, and he was my little brother that I wanted to protect more than anything. I nearly lost friendships due to my loyalty to him. I didn’t want anyone speaking against his plan, and I didn’t want anyone speaking about their problems with him to me. Recently, my friend threw me away. I feel like I have been divorced by him, for real. That’s the way it is with me, when I have truly loved a friend.

As with all divorces, even ones between friends, hearts do heal. I will heal and he will heal. We will go on and we will never cross paths again. Once I’m divorced, whether from a spouse or from a friend, I don’t look back. I have to move forward. For some reason some friends we choose are toxic, and we don’t see it until the poison touches us.

A friend is not a friend if he/she throws things up to you. This friend threw it up to me that I took his money and ran….like I robbed him at gun point! The sad fact was, I was hired to do a job and I did it well. He offered me the terms and I accepted it as the scope of the job. Once you set the scope of the job, you don’t change it after the fact.


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Comments (2)

You have down an amazing job with this one. Excellent work.

Ditto Martin's comments, Charlene. Nice work.